The douchebag is, quite literally, a useless sexist tool. And that is why it makes for such an attractive, even overused insult. But what does the human douchebag really look like? Why do we call him that and what do we hate about the douchebag?
If we think of the douchebag as a social identity as much as an accusation, as a subject with a distinctive persona locatable within the categories of race, class, gender and sexuality, then we find that the term carries a remarkably precise definition.
The douchebag is someone — overwhelmingly white, rich, heterosexual males — who insist upon, nay, demand their white male privilege in every possible set and setting.
The douchebag is equally douchy (that’s the adjectival version of the term) in public as in private. He is a douchebag waiting in line for coffee as well as in the bedroom. This definition marks him, like the atavistic, dusty rubber douchebags of our grandmothers’ generation, as a useless, sexist tool. Armed with this refined definition, I believe the term “douchebag” is the white racial slur we have all been waiting for. We have only to realize this. White privilege itself has blinded us to the true nature of the douchebag’s identity. But it’s been there all along.
The precise race, class and gender position of the douchebag marks this identity as a specific subset of the asshole, another identity on the rise in the twenty-first century. The asshole — as brilliantly defined by Ta-Nehisi Coates — is someone who insists that all social encounters occur on their terms, as in, “hey that person over there with the google glass is an asshole!” (Glasshole! Get it?) But anyone can be an asshole, after all we all have one.
The douchebag is always a white guy. But he is more than that. The douchebag is the demanding 1%, and the far more numerically significant class of white, heterosexist men who ape and aspire to be them. Wall Street guys are douchebags to be sure, but so is anyone looking to cash in on his white male privilege.
This narrowness of categorization — perhaps unique in the history of America’s rich history of racial and sexual slurs — is what makes the word douchebag such a potentially useful political tool.
Onion, medium yellow
Carrot, one large
Celery, two stalks
Small bag of frozen peas
Can of Campbell’s cream of mushroom soup
Bag of frozen tater tots
Chop the veggies medium-fine, soften/sweat in pan with oil or butter. Add herbs and seasoning if you care to. Off heat, stir in peas. Put veggies in casserole baking dish. Mix soup with can of milk, pour over veggies. Arrange tater tots across the top.
Bake in 350 degree oven 45-60 minutes, until hot and lightly browned on top.
A dash of soy sauce in the soup mix adds a little extra savoriness. You can change the filling to include almost anything (traditional might be browned ground beef, onion, peas). Serves 4-6. Killer Minnesota comfort food.
It’s my theory that #Gamergate as a movement is now acting out of fear. After the release of the IRC logs revealing the movement for what it is, the damning mainstream opinion pieces, and a brutal series of PR losses, the movement is now scared, and lashing out at everything that stands to fit the narrative of their perceived aggressors. At this point, there is no dialogue, even though they still say they are trying to promote one. You simply can’t have a sane and productive conversation with someone who would be happier if you killed yourself.
In which a vague group of contrarian trolls becomes an actively amoral hate group.
The air in Silver Lake was a fresh as a drunkard’s breath on Sunday morning. I drove until I found the place, a YMCA with a façade that had last been scrubbed during the Eisenhower administration. I parked next to a green sedan with a COEXIST sticker on the bumper. Yeah, this was the place.
“In this world, there are things you can only do alone, and things you can only do with somebody else. It’s important to combine the two in just the right amount.”—Haruki Murakami, After Dark (via quotes-shape-us)